When a fellow gets his face slapped by a beautiful woman, it usually means something went wrong.
And so it was. Something, the beautiful woman announced, was wrong.
"You have wrinkles," said the beautiful woman. "And your left cheek is larger than your right cheek. It's puffier."
All these woes could be fixed, she said, and for only $350. That's how much it coststo get your face slapped at a brand-new massage parlor on Geary Boulevard that specializes in a beauty treatment billed as the "ancient Thai art of face slapping."
The beautiful woman is a Bangkok-born masseuse who goes by the name of Tata. She and her husband, Mawin Sombuntham, are putting the finishing touches on their face-slapping parlor, set to open later this month. It's the first of its kind on this side of the Pacific, they said, which means they have the $350-slapping market to themselves. In Thai face slapping, unlike the "how-dare-you" kind of face slapping, the idea is to firm up flabby faces without plastic surgery or injections.
To demonstrate, Tata instructed this reporter to take a seat on the official slapping stool. She stared long and hard, planning her attack. Before her lay a sea of wrinkles, frown lines, droopy skin and other signs of being overedited.
Thai pop tunes began blasting from a stereo. Tata started to sway to the music, like a charmed cobra. The large hat on her head, full of plastic roses and lilies, began to bounce up and down.
She raised her right hand. This reporter never saw it coming.
Whap! Whap! Whap!
It didn't hurt, exactly, but it didn't tickle, either. It was something like a flu shot or an accordion concert. Read more at SF Gate.