Kermit Gosnell Trial

Grand Jury Testimony Link

(NSFW) Here

The documentary:

Nine News Nuggets You Need to Know.

Honorable Mention

Daisy, Daisy give me your answer do…

 #9 

Cuz I got high, cuz I got high, cuz I got high.

 #8 

i.e. Weathervein (sic)

#7   

Huh, huh, 500 year old wood.

#6 

Bet they play Skrillex in the waiting room

#5 

I’m still an Edward ‘40 hands guy myself.

#4 

Free the girls!  His life depend on them! …please?

#3 

“…That's the umbilical cord.” I said, “Don't cut that. let him dream for a while.”

#2 

Poop…in…spaaaace!

#1 

Baabaa Bo'zorg Paradox

# Honorable Mention

Or you can use it to collect all of Voldemort's Horcruxes!

 #9 

AKA:   Brahmins, Kshatriyas, Vaisyas, Sudras, Harijans

#8 

1.21 Kegelwatts?  Great Scott!

#7 

I want to ride my bicycle

#6

For Sale:  6 year old:  low miles, craves affection from parents and teachers, can be rigid, demanding, and unable to adapt.  1,500 or OBO.

#5  

You can call her Flower if you want to. 

#4

An L5 for an L5 

#3 Stoned and Starving

#2  Oo-kii-mono

#1 

….and so far up your ass that you will have toes for teeth

Important Links

Sons of baseball 

Sons of baseball Facebook page

The O.C. Register article that started it all.

Honorable Mention

POTUS single malt

#9  Kansas City has it's eye on you

#8  Nice Try Katniss

#7  That was great.  Do it again.

#6  

Áåëûå ëèíèè

#5

And comes with a copy of Sex and the City II

#4

The scientific term is "hoo-hah."

#3

Kites are fun!

#2  Nail Mail

#1

Chocolate milk sloshball it is.

Honorable Mention: Private jet tickets for cheap... if you pass the interview stage

#9: Woman digs another woman's eye out of socket

#8: Death Wish is the 'most highly caffeinated premium dark roast organic coffee in the world.' Sounds yummy.

#7: Connecticut lawmakers are considering a bill that would allow malt beverages and beer to be sold in pliable pouches.

#6: Sex toy massages... on throats?

#5: Can't yell "Bingo!" if you don't have a Bingo. Duh.

#4: Cool it on the Axe, children.

#3: Itchy back? Could be a knife blade.

#2: "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Are we there yet? Mommy! Mommy! MMOOOMMMMMMYYYYY!!!!"

#1: Whatever happened to, "Where did you grow up?"

My younger son goes to Temple, where he’s a sophomore. This year he’s living in an apartment with two friends at 19th and Diamond, just a few blocks from campus. It’s a dangerous neighborhood. Whenever I go see Nick, I get antsy and wonder what I was thinking, allowing him to rent there.

One day, before I pick him up for lunch, I stop to talk to a cop who’s parked a block away from Nick’s apartment.

Read the rest of the story from Philadelphia Magazine here

Honorable Mention

Gagpipes 

#9

pןɹoʍ ɹǝɥ sı sıɥʇ

 #8

Have Sword Will  Travel

#7

Destemmed

#6

Save a tree, use a fork

#5

Return of the Twinkie Kid

#4

Ho-klahoma

#3

Honey, please drop that hebetude

#2

Nibbles is my co-pilot

#1

Spoon

Honorable Mention

Painkiller Jane

#9 

R.O.U.S.

#8

This seat reserved for yellow Diners Club holders only

#7

Say no to crack

#6

88 lines about 44 applicants

#5

Is this another bughunt?

#4

Beer Nuts

#3

If it's too loud, you're too old

#2

Pööplöp

#1

Do it for mommy

Honorable Mention

Now that's an earworm

#9  Find my booty

#8  Dinner has been comman'deered'

#7  Private Pyle, what are you doing to my beloved classroom?

#6  Does this vacuum make me look fat?

#5  American beer is like making love in a canoe

#4  Eidetic Memorial

#3  Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

#2

Grow up be a man and close your mealy mouth

#1

In space no one can hear you nag.

Honorable Mention

Data, initiate sensor sweep

#9

He ain't no C.H.O.M.P.S.

#8

You want fries to go with that shake

#7

He did have a temperature of 2000 degrees...

#6

He's totally em-brazzer-ing

#5

No big hair!

#4

Roadkill Bill

#3

Talk about ssslipping them a Mickey

#2

Hong Kong Foolery

#1

Whitewine.com