In case you ever wondered what it would look like to be eaten by a grizzly bear, there's this...

ya know, a bears mouth is really disgusting...it needs a tic tac.

-Crozier-

Pardon the indulgence...

...just got off the phone on this Mother's Day and felt compelled.

I'll admit there've been some Mother's days that have gone by that don't resonate so much with me. Then there are some, like today, I am thankful for because I appreciate it's meaning just a bit more.

With the hours I work at KFI, I am fortunate to do a LOT of volunteer time at my daughters school. She's in 6th grade this year, so that will end very quickly, but it's been invaluable to me and Sydney. With all the work I do there, I've seen more than my fair share of Mom's doing their thing as Mom's do...raising the next great generation.

Between school stuff and KFI, I'm around many people who care very deeply about what it means to be a great parent, in particular, great Mom's.

At the age of 7, I was separated from my Mother geographically. It sucked as you can imagine it would. The amount of times I've been with her since are a tragic and constant reminder of why you should appreciate any time you have with loved ones.

My mother isn't perfect, duh...who's mother is? Circumstance's sometimes force people to make tough decisions and time has only confirmed how tough those decisions are. BUT, I've never questioned that the tough decisions were made with the pure heart only a parent... only a mother, can have.

So, on this day where I am grateful to appreciate mine, I thank all the Mom's I've known, from Jennifer, Lisa Ann, Heidi, Muna, Christa, Amy, Alissa, Fadia, Karla, Kimberly, the other's too many to mention in this little blog of mine...

...to Linda.

I love you, Mom

-Crozier-

I was born in Washington D.C. and after spending some time growing up in Miami and Kansas(huh?) I moved back to the DC area for the formative years. Now, anybody that's been in the DC, Maryland, Virginia areas knows about the cicada thing.

Cute, huh?

Millions, possibly BILLIONS of cicadas literally rise up from the ground to mate and they're EVERYWHERE. It kinda starts around North Carolina and moves northward.

They don't bite and they don't sting, but that does not negate the gross factor because they are EVERYWHERE!

It happens every 17 years, which means this years "Swarmageddon" will be the first for the little bastards of the 21st Century. And the sound is loud and horrible, exactly what you'd think for a huge swarm. When people are not stepping on them(horrible crunching sound and feel) or cleaning them off their cars, many try to make the month and a half long event a fun time.

Some use them as fashion...

...some use them as food...

...I use them as one of the reasons I'm glad I don't live there anymore.

Sweet dreams

-Crozier-

CAUTION-BAD LANGUAGE AHEAD!!(Seems like I type that an awful lot)

Many people have heard this essay on the F-word. I remember this guy being known as Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. Apparently he went by Osho for about a year before his death in 1990. Regardless, he gave his rendition of this speech about 30 years ago when he was going by the Bhagwan name.

Crozier

This is just one of a few videos of this lady that have apparently gone "viral"...and on a side note, I'm getting a bit tired of that word, kinda like "epic."

Anyway, most of us have come across the phrase "Dance like no one is watching." I like that concept and love this application!

I suspect "Dancing Queen" was NOT the song she was dancing to, but I don't care. I was genuinely sad when the bus pulled away at the end.

...and I seriously want to give a high five to anyone I see with the nards to live life like this.

CROZIER

********CAUTION---FOUL LANGUAGE AHEAD!!**********

Once in a blue moon I'm told I could or should go for the "TV thing." I'm not sure that would or should be my "thing." Seeing stuff like this makes me think I DEFINITELY could do better than this guy!" He does have my sympathies, tho.

Enjoy from our friends at Deadspin.com

Brand New TV News Anchor's First Words On-Air: "F***in' S**t!"

Choose an appropriate destination. Choose a hike or trail that is appropriate to your group's experience, fitness, navigation skills and knowledge of the area. As a general rule, take children only on routes which allow for a safe and easy retreat.

Check the weather. Mountain weather is particularly unpredictable. Click here for the most up-to-date National Weather Service forecast for the San Bernardino County Mountains. Find weather conditions here.

Create and share a trip plan. Some of the most difficult wilderness searches start when a person or group is reported missing and there is no knowledge of what area, trail or timetable that person or group had chosen. Information contained in a trip plan will greatly assist search efforts. Download, and fill-out our Wilderness Trip Plan Form before your next trip, and leave it with a responsible party or on your dashboard (folded).

Pack the Ten Essentials (and West Valley SAR’s 11th Essential). Before you hit any trail, no matter how easy, short, or close to home, make sure your backpack includes the ten eleven essential systems. In the 1930's, The Mountaineers, a Seattle-based organization for climbers and outdoor adventurers, developed the "Ten Essentials." This list of items could save a life in the event of an emergency and should be carried by all hikers. You may not use these items on every trip, but in the case of need, you'll be glad you have them.

The Ten Essentials 'systems' and West Valley SAR’s 11th Essential are:

1. Navigation - map and compass
2. Sun protection - sunscreen and sunglasses
3. Insulation - extra clothing (appropriate for the season)
4. Illumination - headlamp (preferred) or flashlight; extra batteries
5. First-aid supplies - backcountry first aid kit
6. Fire - matches and fire starter
7. Repair kit and tools - multi-purpose tool and duct tape
8. Nutrition - extra food
9. Hydration - extra water
10. Emergency shelter - space blanket, tarp or large garbage bag
11. West Valley SAR’s 11th Essential – Signaling and communication – whistle and mirror
    
    Read more at West Valley Search And Rescue 

"Top 5"...that's usually what I say whenever the movie "Boogie Nights" comes up in conversation.  Everybody's got their list, or should. I may go deeper into mine in the future, but for now, this story from ifc.com got me itching to throw this in the blu-ray. It's got to be one of the best ensemble movies ever. The subject is interesting, but the underlying story of dysfunction and finding family in the most unusual places is incredible.  Every character is extremely well portrayed and either launched or revitalized great acting careers. Plus the music is phenomenal. If you haven't, you need to catch this little piece of cinematic gold.

10 lessons learned from “Boogie Nights”

Photo courtesy New Line Cinema/ Courtesy: Everett Collection

1. Porn stars tend to come from bad parents

Chris Rock once said a father’s job is to keep his son off the pipe and his daughter off the pole. In this case, Eddie’s mother is so verbally abusive and alcoholically crazy that she drives her son to make a living off of his pipe/pole. The stories of those in the sex industry with histories of virulent, unconscionable mistreatment from their parents are omnipresent, although a goodly number of them claim to simply be exhibitionists. The odds are good, however, that if this is your child’s chosen field – however noble a cause it might be to provide vicarious release to the anonymous lonely folk of the world – you may have messed up somewhere along the line.

2. Porn stars also tend to make bad parents

It seems that Amber Waves was born a few decades too early. In the early 1980s, being a porn star with a history of drug abuse and trouble with the law meant that you would be denied custody of and probably even visitation rights to your child, forcing you to cobble together what family you could amongst the people drifting in the same morass of emotional wreckage that you are. These days, it would probably land you, your child and your entire extended family a reality show on E! for fourteen seasons.

3. Do not repeatedly cheat on your significant other in public

Marital fidelity is a tricky thing to navigate in the porn industry, naturally, but it’s perhaps not a good idea to treat your partner’s concerns like this, as if they’re nothing more than the inconvenient distraction of a noisy yap-dog watching you have sex with other people as a form of public entertainment. Sooner or later, your henpecked Little Bill may deny you the chance to experience the 1980s, or anything else ever again.

4. There has to be a better way to come out than this

It’s certainly never easy to let other people know that you like them, and it’s much less so when you’re gay and you have no idea if they are. Although Scotty had plenty of filmed evidence to the contrary, he nonetheless bought a car because he thought Dirk would like it, all as an excuse to try to force a kiss onto him. If that’s the way you choose to come out of the closet, it will probably leave you believing that you’re a fucking idiot, too.

5. Crime doesn’t pay the people it’s supposed to

The allure of the gun-toting, fast-paced world of crime is that it seems like easy money, but you can never underestimate the chaos of gunplay. Buck Swope just went into Dunkin’ Donuts to get his pregnant lady some bearclaws, and thanks to an inconveniently-timed robber and an inconveniently-timed vigilante resulting in an all-too-convenient bloodbath, the only person that crime wound up paying was Buck, who happened to need some stereo equipment store capital.

 6. Covering a song from “Transformers: The Movie” is not the path to fame

Those of us who grew up in the 1980s had our brains melt a bit when Marky Mark Wahlberg, in the middle of this epic porn saga, started belting out Stan Bush’s “The Touch” with all the style and aplomb that you’d expect from a man who got famous as a rapper with the Funky Bunch. There’s a certain amount of love in our heart for that song thanks to its heroic connotations for Optimus Prime, but listening to a washed up Dirk Diggler croak out its cheesy lyrics in a recording studio while thinking it’s his ticket to the top made us realize that it isn’t much better than “Feel My Heat.” The heat will not roll you.

7. The first key to success is having an awesome name

Amidst all the toil and trouble that bubbles and bubbles throughout this film, Eddie’s life is not without some successes, and when they don’t center around his tremendous dong, they spring from his choice of nomenclature. The name “Dirk Diggler” appears to him on a big sign with bright blue neon lights with, like, purple outline, and that name is just so bright and so sharp that the sign, it just blows up because the name is just so powerful, but that’s not all. When it comes time to create his signature on-screen character, lightning strikes twice for him with Brock Landers, and his partner Chest Rockwell.

8. Know when to get some new shit

This lesson is pretty well spelled out by The Colonel here. If you are a cocaine enthusiast and women keep overdosing on you and harshing your buzz – like, multiple times in the span of a couple of days – you might want to look into changing your narcotics suppliers and search for someone more reputable with which to procure your illicit substances.

9. Never trust a gun-toting dancer with a coke habit to handle delicate negotiations

Common sense will tell you that when you’re trying to sell a bunch of drugs to a Night Ranger-crooning Alfred Molina with his bathrobe hanging open while some guy randomly sets off firecrackers all over the place, you’re going to want to handle those negotiations with a certain amount of finesse. You certainly do not want to put this volatile transaction in the hands of a coked-up Thomas Jane who is secretly determined to rob the place without so much as a heads up. This goes hand-in-hand with the earlier lesson about crime not paying the right people, too.

10. Always have a fallback option when shooting for stardom

Eddie Adams knew from the beginning that everyone is blessed with one special thing, and that his special thing was much like Navin R. Johnson’s Special Purpose. However, being able to identify your particular talent and/or gift does not necessarily mean you’ll make the best use of it. For a time, once he became Dirk Diggler, he certainly made the most out of his sizable skin flute, but such bright starlight burns out fast, and he nearly ends where he began – masturbating in strangers’ cars for money. It would really have behooved him to learn a trade instead of putting all his eggs in one slab of miracle meat.

Crozier

Happy St Patrick's Day! This is from me(and damnyouautocorrect.com) to you...enjoy!

Crozier