News anchor. Radio personality. Writer of dark stories and poems. User of incomplete sentences in lieu of comma-separated lists.
I’ve been in the broadcasting industry for longer than I care to admit, long enough to see that what it’s turning into is a completely different thing than what it was. No one knows yet if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. I do believe radio will survive, but it won’t look like anything we expect. Content is still king.
I’ve been writing dark stories and poems since before I got into radio… so it’s interesting to note that I’ve had much more success in the broadcasting field than in the literary. Does this mean I should stop writing? No. My brain won’t let me.
In the meantime I get my jollies being the midday news anchor during the Bill Carroll Show on KFI. I'm a big Carroll fan, so this is juicy for me.
For fun I love good movies, good books and good television. And I love arguing about the definition of “good” when it comes to movies, books and television.
CHECK OUT MY PERSONAL BLOG
YOU CAN ALSO READ MY DARK STORIES AND POEMS
This blog may contain profanity and/or material considered inappropriate. The views expressed in this blog are the opinions of the individual writer and do not necessarily reflect the views of KFI AM-640 and Clear Channel Radio.
A public memorial for TSA officer Gerardo Hernandez was held at the LA Memorial Sports Arena. (11/12/13)
First off, thanks to everyone who tuned in for my debut as Gary's fill-in on the KFI Sunday Morning News. Hopefully not too many executives get fired over the decision.
On to the big movie this weekend...
While pretty and filled with good effects, Thor: The Dark World seems unnecessary. I'm enough of a comic book nerd to get the whole universe Marvel is building with its series of Iron Man, Captain America and Avengers movies, but this Thor sequel doesn't seem to advance anything in the larger narrative in any important way.
Most of Thor takes place in other realms, and only a little on earth, though part of the final battle -- and all these movies have to have THE BIG FINAL BATTLE -- takes place on earth. For the most part the movie is filled with an inner mythology with which it was hard to feel a connection.
And the most tiresome thing in movies like this -- why do the stakes always have to be bigger and bigger? It’s always THE FATE OF THE ENTIRE HUMAN RACE or somesuch. In Thor’s case, it’s THE FATE OF THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE AND ALL OF EXISTENCE. (Insert numerous exclamation points here.) At some point, I think I’d love to see a superhero set out to rescue some kid’s pet.
I give high marks to the 3D because it’s mostly used to show depth, not to arbitrarily throw things in our faces.
And, as with all these Marvel movies, stay through the end of the credits. You get not one but two extra scenes.
Thor gets three out of five hammers. Not bad, but for all the money the producers put up on the screen, it should have been better.
I'm getting a lot of this around the hallways: "Better be as good as Gary!"
I'm filling in for Hoffmann on this weekend's edition of The Sunday Morning News with Gary Hoffmann.
It's only Wednesday and already I'm having anxiety dreams of turning on the microphone and talking for two minutes... and then running out of topics, and another hour and 58 minutes to fill. And in my dreams there's a crowd of Clear Channel executives all looking at me, slowly shaking their heads.
Here are some of the things on the planning board already: "Social networking is a trap that will always get you fired." "Movie review double header." "Rob Ford audio is really a ballet." And a visit from a hair metal band expert.
We'll also have the Nine News Nuggets, and I'm working really hard to find a way to play Barf Music.
Be there or don't!
LET THE LOWERING OF EXPECTATIONS BEGIN!
Yes, the rumors are true. Gary Hoffmann has asked me to fill in for him on the next edition of The Sunday Morning News with Gary Hoffmann. Yes, the preceding sentence is redundant, but hey, Hoffmann adds a redundant 'n' to his name so why not.
You gotta wonder how many other people Gary asked before he was forced to ask me.
Anyway, I hope you'll tune in to see which way we go. Either an acceptable job will be done by yours truly, or it will be a disaster of such proportions that executives will be fired and future Hoffmann absences will be filled with reruns of old shows.
I'll have the Nine News Nuggets You Need To Know and the return of "Barf Music." Be there or don't.
In-flight safety videos are usually ignored. In fact, people go out of their way to ignore them. I mean, a video that wastes time showing you how to fasten your seat belt? C'mon!
Virgin America has solved that problem with a video and a song that will stick in your head all day. And they've helpfully put it up on YouTube:
Watch rare Star Wars bloopers while you can, before Disney forces YouTube to take it down.
(Note: the first 50 seconds or so are silent.)
Read more about them here.